{"id":876,"date":"2026-05-31T08:37:11","date_gmt":"2026-05-31T08:37:11","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=876"},"modified":"2026-05-31T08:37:11","modified_gmt":"2026-05-31T08:37:11","slug":"dear-abby-every-time-we-argue-this-is-my-girlfriends-go-to-insult","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=876","title":{"rendered":"Dear Abby: Every time we argue, this is my girlfriend’s go-to insult"},"content":{"rendered":"
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DEAR ABBY<\/strong>: I\u2019m a 36-year-old divorced man who has been living with my girlfriend for a year. She is much more accomplished and sophisticated in most aspects than I am.<\/p>\n

Read more Today in History: May 31, South Fork Dam collapse kills more than 2,200<\/a><\/p>\n

She brings this up in any argument. How do I deal with this?<\/p>\n

\u2014 LESS THAN IN TEXAS<\/em><\/p>\n

DEAR LESS THAN:<\/strong> There is a name for people who do what your girlfriend has been doing. They are intellectual bullies.<\/p>\n

Your girlfriend may be more sophisticated than you \u201cin most aspects,\u201d but her people skills are atrocious. She doesn\u2019t know how to fight fair, and if she doesn\u2019t stop, she will manage to drive you away.<\/p>\n

Tell her that. It may help.<\/p>\n

DEAR ABBY:<\/strong> We\u2019re a same-sex couple, and my husband has never gotten along with my sister and her husband. The tension has grown over the 17 years they\u2019ve known each other.<\/p>\n

I suspect my sister may feel competitive or even jealous of our relationship. She comes across as self-focused, while her husband is quiet and disengaged.<\/p>\n

\n<\/div>\n

We see them once a year for a few days, but my husband now avoids them entirely \u2014 he even opts to stay in a hotel during part of their visit.<\/p>\n

I feel torn: I understand my husband feels disrespected, but I\u2019m also hurt that my only close family isn\u2019t truly welcome in our home. Please help.<\/p>\n

\u2014 AWKWARD SIS-UATION<\/em><\/p>\n

DEAR SIS-UATION:<\/strong> If your sister and her husband can\u2019t treat your husband with more warmth, I\u2019m not sure why you would expect him to welcome them with open arms.<\/p>\n

Read more State champion! St. Ignatius\u2019 Ellie McCuskey-Hay wins girls long jump<\/a><\/p>\n

\n<\/div>\n

Because you\u2019re paying for a room anyway, why not put them up in the hotel and get together outside your home for meals or other outings? If your husband can limit his exposure to them without having to flee his own house, the situation may feel less awkward.<\/p>\n

DEAR ABBY<\/strong>: I am a 32-year-old single gay man. I\u2019m no longer looking for a relationship.<\/p>\n

I feel increasingly comfortable in my own skin while keeping a healthy distance from 95% of people. I have become like this during the past three to five years because I have my own drama to deal with and can\u2019t handle anyone else\u2019s drama on top of it.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s not that I don\u2019t like people, I have just reached the point where I\u2019m increasingly less trusting of people, in general, including my employers at the company for which I drive a truck long-distance.<\/p>\n

Just wanted to know what your thoughts are on this.<\/p>\n

\u2014 ALONE IN NORTH CAROLINA<\/em><\/p>\n

DEAR ALONE:<\/strong> At age 32, you are still a young man with a long life ahead of you. I\u2019m sorry you didn\u2019t mention what has happened to you that has made you less and less trusting of others \u2014 it would have been helpful, because relationships are important.<\/p>\n

My thought on this is: You need to make an appointment at the nearest LGBTQ community center and talk to a therapist about this. And, if necessary, consider looking for another company to drive for \u2014 or even a career change \u2014 because it isn\u2019t healthy to have to look over your shoulder 24\/7.<\/p>\n

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.<\/em><\/p>\n

Read more In Arcadia, a mayor\u2019s guilty plea stokes fears of Beijing\u2019s influence<\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Plus: When my sister visits, my husband stays in a hotel.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":88,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-876","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-advice"],"yoast_head":"\nDear Abby: Every time we argue, this is my girlfriend’s go-to insult - Next City Digest<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=876\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Dear Abby: Every time we argue, this is my girlfriend’s go-to insult - Next City Digest\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Plus: When my sister visits, my husband stays in a hotel.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=876\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Next City Digest\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2026-05-31T08:37:11+00:00\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"admin\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"admin\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"3 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=876#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=876\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"admin\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/13065d40d633843429ac57d4e5c06f9b\"},\"headline\":\"Dear Abby: Every time we argue, this is my girlfriend’s go-to insult\",\"datePublished\":\"2026-05-31T08:37:11+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=876\"},\"wordCount\":616,\"commentCount\":0,\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=876#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2026\\\/05\\\/da2b25e1d5f51854817d4fde3f343c6c.webp\",\"articleSection\":[\"Advice\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=876#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=876\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=876\",\"name\":\"Dear Abby: Every time we argue, this is my girlfriend’s go-to insult - 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