{"id":7920,"date":"2026-08-28T08:36:15","date_gmt":"2026-08-28T08:36:15","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=7920"},"modified":"2026-08-28T08:36:15","modified_gmt":"2026-08-28T08:36:15","slug":"miss-manners-can-i-tell-the-tourists-we-dont-want-to-see-their-underwear","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=7920","title":{"rendered":"Miss Manners: Can I tell the tourists we don’t want to see their underwear?"},"content":{"rendered":"
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DEAR MISS MANNERS<\/strong>: Is there an etiquette prohibition against airing one\u2019s dirty laundry? And I mean literally \u2014 as from the balcony of a historic hotel facing a beautiful public park!<\/p>\n

Read more Dear Abby: I want to go back to my ex-wife. How do I discuss this civilly with my partner?<\/a><\/p>\n

Perhaps a swimsuit on a chair, or in an inner courtyard balcony, but what are these people thinking, displaying their underwear? Could a fellow traveler hint at the inappropriate, tacky nature of this display?<\/p>\n

GENTLE READER<\/strong>: How? By shouting it up to the balcony? That would be more than just a hint \u2014 and would put you on display, rather than the laundry.<\/p>\n

But perhaps by \u201cfellow traveler,\u201d you mean traveling companion and you are closer to the situation.<\/p>\n

Either way, Miss Manners would find it difficult to admonish someone politely \u2014 and without the valid retort that it is charming when the locals do it.<\/p>\n

DEAR MISS MANNERS:<\/strong> An exceptionally kind and creative friend died suddenly. My friend had a broad following on social media, so there was an outpouring of condolence messages.<\/p>\n

It was comforting to read the loving messages, but I was bothered by some messages which ended in \u201cRIP\u201d instead of words. It seemed a little tacky to me.<\/p>\n

GENTLE READER<\/strong>: The sentiment itself, or that it is an acronym? There was a time when it was commonly used on tombstones, which is not an informal medium.<\/p>\n

\n<\/div>\n

But Miss Manners will remind you that posting condolences on social media is never a standard for serious communication, even when the messages bring their readers comfort. Better to put those sentiments in a letter to the family \u2014 where, yes, signing off with \u201cRIP\u201d would be tacky and best avoided.<\/p>\n

Read more Napa County prosecutors charge winery worker with starting 2025 Pickett Fire<\/a><\/p>\n

DEAR MISS MANNERS<\/strong>: For years, my older sister served food she knew I could not or would not eat. I ate what I could and did not select the other foods at the buffet, if given a choice.<\/p>\n

For years, she complained I was too picky, even though I told her my doctor had tested me and that I was allergic to beef and could not eat spicy foods, nor anything with nuts, seeds or skins. Turns out, I had diverticulitis, as had our father.<\/p>\n

But my older sister knew better and was convinced that if she told me to eat a certain food, I would do what she told me.<\/p>\n

\n<\/div>\n

The last time I \u201cate\u201d at her house, the only thing I could eat was mashed potatoes, and I had to insist that she leave the beef gravy off. Even the ice cream for dessert had nuts and seeds in it.<\/p>\n

No one is sorrier than I am that I can\u2019t eat salsa or nuts or drink coffee. However, I prefer not to be ill after a meal. I cannot comprehend the reason other people think I should or must eat a certain way.<\/p>\n

GENTLE READER<\/strong>: It is not only rude, but also inconvenient. Miss Manners would think that your sister would want to ward off any illness, not just for your sake, but also for the clean-up afterwards.<\/p>\n

As long as allergies, medical excuses, dietary concerns and even preferences are politely stated and not made the focus of the event, reasonable accommodations should be made without fear of coercion or bullying. And that goes for that second round of dessert or martinis, too.<\/p>\n

Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, gentlereader@missmanners.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.<\/em><\/p>\n

Read more Possible murder-suicide being investigated by Pleasanton police<\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Their laundry ruins what would be a beautiful view.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":5289,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-7920","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-advice"],"yoast_head":"\nMiss Manners: Can I tell the tourists we don’t want to see their underwear? - Next City Digest<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=7920\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Miss Manners: Can I tell the tourists we don’t want to see their underwear? - Next City Digest\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Their laundry ruins what would be a beautiful view.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=7920\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Next City Digest\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2026-08-28T08:36:15+00:00\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"admin\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"admin\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"3 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=7920#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=7920\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"admin\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/13065d40d633843429ac57d4e5c06f9b\"},\"headline\":\"Miss Manners: Can I tell the tourists we don’t want to see their underwear?\",\"datePublished\":\"2026-08-28T08:36:15+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=7920\"},\"wordCount\":637,\"commentCount\":0,\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=7920#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2026\\\/07\\\/afa6305b0bc2ad18ff319793b8dcff0b.webp\",\"articleSection\":[\"Advice\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=7920#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=7920\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=7920\",\"name\":\"Miss Manners: Can I tell the tourists we don’t want to see their underwear? 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