{"id":7831,"date":"2026-08-27T08:06:49","date_gmt":"2026-08-27T08:06:49","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=7831"},"modified":"2026-08-27T08:06:49","modified_gmt":"2026-08-27T08:06:49","slug":"dear-abby-i-told-this-teen-i-saw-her-rash-posts-but-she-wont-stop","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=7831","title":{"rendered":"Dear Abby: I told this teen I saw her rash posts, but she won&#8217;t stop"},"content":{"rendered":"<div>\n<div>\n<p><strong>DEAR ABBY<\/strong>: I got permission from my estranged brother to invite his 17-year-old daughter, \u201cElla,\u201d to spend a month with my family this summer.<\/p>\n<p>Read more <a href=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=7830\">Roger Goodell says NFL is looking into whether to punish 49ers owner Jed York following his arrest<\/a><\/p>\n<p>We live on the East Coast, and she lives on the West Coast. Ella is about to graduate from high school and has had a difficult home life and relationship with her dad and stepmother.<\/p>\n<p>After making her travel arrangements, I came across recent social media posts that she wrote disparaging her father. I\u2019m in no position to discipline or judge her, but I felt that I had to say something so she knows that I don\u2019t condone what she has done.<\/p>\n<p>I\u2019m now second-guessing whether it\u2019s a good idea to have Ella around my 13- and 9-year-old children this summer. I told her the following: \u201cI hadn\u2019t seen your post about your father and stepmother. As a loving adult, I want you to know I think it\u2019s very inappropriate. These kinds of postings tend to reflect more about the person posting than the people the post is about. For your own good, you should know that you, too, may be judged for what you have done \u2014 if not now, possibly in the future when you least want or expect it.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ella didn\u2019t respond to me and continues to write more disrespectful posts. Should I say anything more? I don\u2019t think my brother knows about the posts, though my niece complained online about his having \u201chacked\u201d her accounts.<\/p>\n<p><em>\u2014 HAVING SECOND THOUGHTS<\/em><\/p>\n<p><strong>DEAR SECOND THOUGHTS:<\/strong> I wish you had mentioned the reason for your estrangement from your brother. Contact him and ask if he is aware of the comments Ella has posted and continues to post. If he is unaware, you should alert him.<\/p>\n<p>The choice of whether to cancel your niece\u2019s visit is up to you, but from where I sit, she appears to be an unhappy girl who could use a break from Dad.<\/p>\n<p>Read more <a href=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=7828\">San Jose releases rankings for a new Plaza de Cesar Chavez name<\/a><\/p>\n<div>\n<\/div>\n<p><strong>DEAR ABBY<\/strong>: I am a 63-year-old woman who retired about eight years ago. I have decided to go back into the workforce \u2014 nothing huge, just a job to enable me to keep up with rising costs and to set some money aside.<\/p>\n<p>My problem is that everyone wants you to apply online. I go online to look for work, I find something of interest, I click on it, and it takes me to a sign-in page for some sort of job site (such as Monster or Indeed). I fill out my information, and then I get a whole list of jobs, none of which are the one I originally clicked on.<\/p>\n<p>I have never had this much trouble finding a job. Any advice would be welcome. I am running out of options.<\/p>\n<p><em>\u2014 WILLING TO WORK<\/em><\/p>\n<div>\n<\/div>\n<p><strong>DEAR WILLING TO WORK<\/strong>: Applying through those online job sites can feel like talking to a wall. Since you aren\u2019t looking for anything fancy, the old-fashioned approach may work better.<\/p>\n<p>Check the bulletin boards of community centers, senior centers, colleges, libraries and similar establishments. When you are out and about, keep your eyes peeled for \u201chelp wanted\u201d notices. If you find yourself near a place you\u2019d like to work, it can\u2019t hurt to stop in and ask if they need help. Also, don\u2019t forget the classified ads in your local newspaper!<\/p>\n<p><em>Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren. For nearly four decades, Jeanne Phillips wrote the column, which was founded in 1956 by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 270135, Kansas City, MO 64127.<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Read more <a href=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=7825\">Girls flag football: How far the sport has come in a short period of time<\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Plus: I&#8217;m looking for a job, and I can&#8217;t navigate these online application sites.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":7028,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-7831","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-advice"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.6 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Dear Abby: I told this teen I saw her rash posts, but she won&#8217;t stop - Next City Digest<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=7831\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Dear Abby: I told this teen I saw her rash posts, but she won&#8217;t stop - 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