{"id":7190,"date":"2026-08-19T08:07:09","date_gmt":"2026-08-19T08:07:09","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=7190"},"modified":"2026-08-19T08:07:09","modified_gmt":"2026-08-19T08:07:09","slug":"dear-abby-what-if-there-really-is-video-of-me-doing-these-things","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=7190","title":{"rendered":"Dear Abby: What if there really is video of me doing these things?"},"content":{"rendered":"<div>\n<div>\n<p><strong>DEAR ABBY:<\/strong> A while back, I started receiving mysterious phone calls from a man claiming to have in his possession videos of me performing sexual acts. I do not know where he would have gotten something like that.<\/p>\n<p>Read more <a href=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=7189\">\u2018Cooking Thai\u2019 Recipe: Thai Tea Cheesecake<\/a><\/p>\n<p>I changed my phone number, but somehow he got my new number and started harassing me again.<\/p>\n<p>Then the phone calls stopped, and I haven\u2019t received one in years.<\/p>\n<p>Recently, I was sent a request on Facebook by a girl with no profile information who then sent me a message saying something about a video and accosting me with sexual language. I have since deleted all my social media accounts.<\/p>\n<p>My question is: What if there is some video I have no knowledge of, and how do I handle it if someone decides to leak it?<\/p>\n<p><em>\u2014 SCARED AND EMBARRASSED<\/em><\/p>\n<p><strong>DEAR SCARED AND EMBARRASSED:<\/strong> What has been happening to you amounts to harassment and blackmail. That is why you should notify the police about what has been going on.<\/p>\n<p>I seriously doubt that there is a video. (The whole thing is probably a scam.)<\/p>\n<div>\n<\/div>\n<p>If there is one and it is leaked, I recommend that you hold your head high and say to anyone who mentions it that yes, like most of the adult population in the world, you, too, have a sex life. At least then you will know who filmed it, and you can share that additional information with the authorities.<\/p>\n<p><strong>DEAR ABBY<\/strong>: I am 70. My sister is 68, and her husband is 80. He has kidney failure and needs 24\/7 care.<\/p>\n<p>Our mother is 98. She lives independently in a condo and is mentally fully functional, but she can\u2019t cook or do housekeeping anymore.<\/p>\n<p>My sister and I take turns making her warm meals, and my sister also does some light housekeeping (Mom has cleaning help). It takes one to two hours.<\/p>\n<p>Read more <a href=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=7187\">Preseason all-Bay Area News Group high school football 2026: Defensive backs<\/a><\/p>\n<div>\n<\/div>\n<p>My sister does this three times a week while her husband is at dialysis at a nearby facility. She also has my mother\u2019s medical and financial powers of attorney and prefers to be the one to take care of things.<\/p>\n<p>I am in fairly good health but have some medical issues that may eventually make it difficult (or even impossible) to travel. This fall, I plan to go to Europe for three weeks.<\/p>\n<p>I would like to have someone come in to help my mom three times a week while I am gone. I would introduce this person ahead of time so that Mom could get to know them and I could show them what needs to be done.<\/p>\n<p>Unfortunately, Mom doesn\u2019t want anyone other than my sister and me to care for her.<\/p>\n<p>My sister\u2019s plate is already more than full, so I don\u2019t want to add to it. Is it unreasonable of me to expect my mother to accept outside help?<\/p>\n<p><em>\u2014 PERPLEXED IN PENNSYLVANIA<\/em><\/p>\n<p><strong>DEAR PERPLEXED:<\/strong> Your plan is not unreasonable, but it\u2019s common for someone your mother\u2019s age to resist change.<\/p>\n<p>Remind her that the clock is ticking on your travel opportunities, and emphasize that the arrangement is only temporary. Tell her you will call to check in while you\u2019re away, and promise to bring back lots of photos and stories to share with her when you resume your normal caregiving routine.<\/p>\n<p>Read more <a href=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=7185\">Man charged in Alameda robbery-shooting<\/a><\/p>\n<p><em>[The Asking Eric column answered the same question. Here\u2019s what he said.]<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>Contact Dear Abby at www.dearabby.com.<\/em><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>A mysterious caller claimed to have compromising video.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":7028,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-7190","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-advice"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.6 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Dear Abby: What if there really is video of me doing these things? - Next City Digest<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=7190\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Dear Abby: What if there really is video of me doing these things? 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