{"id":6720,"date":"2026-08-13T08:08:35","date_gmt":"2026-08-13T08:08:35","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=6720"},"modified":"2026-08-13T08:08:35","modified_gmt":"2026-08-13T08:08:35","slug":"dear-abby-my-daughter-is-stuck-in-a-cultlike-situation-and-she-cant-get-a-divorce","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=6720","title":{"rendered":"Dear Abby: My daughter is stuck in a cultlike situation and she can&#8217;t get a divorce"},"content":{"rendered":"<div>\n<div>\n<p><strong>DEAR ABBY<\/strong>: I have a daughter, \u201cImogen,\u201d who has been married for 20 years to her narcissistic and controlling wife, \u201cBrianna.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Read more <a href=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=6719\">Stabbing in San Jose leaves one in critical condition<\/a><\/p>\n<p>Imogen\u2019s relationships with me, my husband and her sister have been entirely dictated by Brianna. We\u2019re not allowed in their house; her calls are made from the car; I have not been invited to birthday parties for their two boys; and I\u2019m told not to attend my grandson\u2019s swimming competitions if Brianna is in the building.<\/p>\n<p>Two attempts at divorce by Imogen were unsuccessful, the last one having been a month ago.<\/p>\n<p>Imogen appears to be willing to accept verbal abuse and non-negotiable demands from her wife, interpreting the control as caring behavior. This cultlike existence has resulted in resentment and disappointment.<\/p>\n<p>I\u2019m at a loss as to how to help my daughter extricate herself from a life of dysfunction and dependency. Any advice would be appreciated.<\/p>\n<p><em>\u2014 WORRIED MOM<\/em><\/p>\n<p><strong>DEAR MOM<\/strong>: Your daughter will not leave Brianna until she\u2019s ready, but that doesn\u2019t mean you should give up.<\/p>\n<p>Avoid criticizing Brianna directly but continue to ask Imogen how Brianna\u2019s controlling actions make her feel. Getting her to think along those lines may lead her in the right direction.<\/p>\n<div>\n<\/div>\n<p>Above all, make sure she knows about the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233, and remind her that controlling behavior is a form of violence.<\/p>\n<p><strong>DEAR ABBY:<\/strong> I have been widowed for seven years. My husband served in the Air Force in Saigon during the conflict in Vietnam.<\/p>\n<p>We met and married shortly after he returned from his hitch overseas. We had two daughters together.<\/p>\n<p>Recently, my older daughter was notified through social media that she has a half-sister from a woman her father knew in Vietnam. They agreed to meet this weekend at a restaurant near where we live.<\/p>\n<p>Read more <a href=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=6717\">Once overrun by all-night raves, famed singer\u2019s former beach property opens as new coastal park<\/a><\/p>\n<div>\n<\/div>\n<p>My daughter asked if I would accompany her to this meeting. I told her that while I had no qualms about finding out he had a child with another woman, I didn\u2019t see any point in my being there to meet her. There is no connection there for me, and I would feel uncomfortable in the situation.<\/p>\n<p>Am I wrong for not going with my daughters to this luncheon?<\/p>\n<p><em>\u2014 UNRELATED IN SOUTH CAROLINA<\/em><\/p>\n<p><strong>DEAR UNRELATED<\/strong>: Although you feel no connection to your late husband\u2019s love child, she is related to your daughters. If they choose to develop a relationship with their half-sister, you cannot ignore her existence forever.<\/p>\n<p>Your daughters may be asking for your support. If you decide to go, do it for them.<\/p>\n<p><strong>DEAR ABBY<\/strong>: My son and his partner have lived together for more than 10 years.<\/p>\n<p>During this time, his partner\u2019s parents and sister have visited my state numerous times. They have stayed at my lake house, in my condo and another home I own. Yet, in all this time, I have never met them (and I have tried to).<\/p>\n<p>When they come into town, it\u2019s almost like they deliberately avoid meeting me. Only once did I receive a thank-you note, on the mantle at one of my homes.<\/p>\n<p>Is this something I should address with my son and his partner? At this point, I feel hurt.<\/p>\n<p><em>\u2014 USED IN THE MIDWEST<\/em><\/p>\n<p><strong>DEAR USED<\/strong>: Should you address this with your son and his partner? Of course you should. In fact, you should have done it the first time you were asked to let these people live in one of your dwellings.<\/p>\n<p>Do you really want to continue having strangers vacation in your homes? Because that\u2019s what they have chosen to make themselves, it may be time to roll up the welcome mat.<\/p>\n<p><em>Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Read more <a href=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=6714\">MP-18 Fire near Hoopa expands to more than 2,800 acres, prompting evacuation order<\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Her attempts at divorce have been unsuccessful.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":5287,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6720","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-advice"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.6 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Dear Abby: My daughter is stuck in a cultlike situation and she can&#8217;t get a divorce - Next City Digest<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=6720\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Dear Abby: My daughter is stuck in a cultlike situation and she can&#8217;t get a divorce - 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