{"id":6448,"date":"2026-08-06T09:06:22","date_gmt":"2026-08-06T09:06:22","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=6448"},"modified":"2026-08-06T09:06:22","modified_gmt":"2026-08-06T09:06:22","slug":"harriette-cole-what-if-the-new-boss-wants-me-to-work-harder","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=6448","title":{"rendered":"Harriette Cole: What if the new boss wants me to work harder?"},"content":{"rendered":"
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DEAR HARRIETTE:<\/strong> I was recently brought into a new job by a former manager. The job is very low-key, low-effort and low-work, which I\u2019m not complaining about. It\u2019s a nice change from the busy job I had at a flagship beauty store.<\/p>\n

Read more Miss Manners: At first I couldn\u2019t believe my neighbor\u2019s insults were directed at me<\/a><\/p>\n

Today at work, my manager was offered a promotion that would require her to move stores; as a result, my store would more than likely get a new manager.<\/p>\n

Would it be stupid for me to follow my manager to her new store? She brought me onto the team herself, and I\u2019m scared that a new manager will be stricter or less accommodating with my schedule.<\/p>\n

\u2014 Job Mover<\/em><\/p>\n

DEAR JOB MOVER:<\/strong> What are your goals for this job? It sounds like you value convenience and flexibility right now more than a path to a career goal. If this manager seems to be in sync with your current needs and desires, ask her whether you can join her at her new store.<\/p>\n

Just make sure you don\u2019t mislead her. You will have to show your loyalty to her and her goals if you move with her. She may be counting on the energy and effort that you demonstrated at your previous job to help at this new company. Find out what her vision is and how you fit into it before you make your pitch.<\/p>\n

DEAR HARRIETTE:<\/strong> I\u2019m struggling with a friendship that used to mean a lot to me but now feels increasingly one-sided.<\/p>\n

This person was once one of my closest friends, but over the past several months, I\u2019ve felt more neglected than valued. We live less than 10 minutes apart, yet we\u2019ve seen each other only twice in nearly eight months \u2014 and both times, I was the one who reached out and made the plans.<\/p>\n

\n<\/div>\n

What\u2019s confusing is that whenever we do spend time together, she says things like, \u201cWe should be closer\u201d or \u201cWe need to hang out more.\u201d But her actions don\u2019t reflect that.<\/p>\n

Read more Dear Abby: By the end of the cruise, the group was shunning me. I don\u2019t know what I did.<\/a><\/p>\n

She\u2019s often out with other friends, yet I\u2019m rarely, if ever, included. Recently, she even traveled out of state and made time to see my sister \u2014 someone she\u2019s not particularly close to \u2014 and sent me a photo saying we\u2019re \u201csisters for life.\u201d That moment really stung.<\/p>\n

The relationship is starting to feel forced and inauthentic. Am I expecting too much, or is it time to reevaluate this friendship?<\/p>\n

\u2014 Times Have Changed<\/em><\/p>\n

\n<\/div>\n

DEAR TIMES HAVE CHANGED:<\/strong> Drum up the courage to speak to your friend directly about this. Schedule a time to be face to face. Tell her how you feel \u2014 namely, that she no longer seems to put effort into your friendship and that it hurts your feelings.<\/p>\n

Point out that you used to hang out together but rarely see each other now. Tell her you miss her and would like to spend more time together.<\/p>\n

See what she says. It could be that you have naturally drifted apart, or it could be something else. Listen to learn, and then decide your next steps.<\/p>\n

If she is unwilling to put in more effort, you may have to accept that this friendship\u2019s dynamics have changed. It may be time to change your expectations.<\/p>\n

Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions toaskharriette@harriettecole.com or c\/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.<\/em><\/p>\n

Read more A tiny fish\u2019s behavior suggests aging may happen in stages, Stanford study finds<\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I like my low-effort job the way it is, and my manager is leaving.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":5384,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6448","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-advice"],"yoast_head":"\nHarriette Cole: What if the new boss wants me to work harder? - Next City Digest<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=6448\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Harriette Cole: What if the new boss wants me to work harder? - Next City Digest\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"I like my low-effort job the way it is, and my manager is leaving.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=6448\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Next City Digest\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2026-08-06T09:06:22+00:00\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"admin\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"admin\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"3 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=6448#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=6448\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"admin\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/13065d40d633843429ac57d4e5c06f9b\"},\"headline\":\"Harriette Cole: What if the new boss wants me to work harder?\",\"datePublished\":\"2026-08-06T09:06:22+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=6448\"},\"wordCount\":650,\"commentCount\":0,\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=6448#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2026\\\/07\\\/934295b22278f63640af5eb98e8b862d.webp\",\"articleSection\":[\"Advice\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=6448#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=6448\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=6448\",\"name\":\"Harriette Cole: What if the new boss wants me to work harder? 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