{"id":5386,"date":"2026-07-25T09:35:55","date_gmt":"2026-07-25T09:35:55","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=5386"},"modified":"2026-07-25T09:35:55","modified_gmt":"2026-07-25T09:35:55","slug":"asking-eric-people-think-my-halloween-obsessed-sister-is-weird-should-i-be-worried-about-her","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=5386","title":{"rendered":"Asking Eric: People think my Halloween-obsessed sister is weird. Should I be worried about her?"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Dear Eric<\/strong>: My 43-year-old sister is completely obsessed with Halloween. Her condo is fully decorated year-round with scary animatronics, she wears Halloween knee socks and shirts every single day, and horror movies are her only topic of conversation.<\/p>\n

Read more Harriette Cole: This man from my past is back as my friend\u2019s boyfriend<\/a><\/p>\n

Our concern grew recently when she wore full Halloween apparel to the birthday parties of her nephews, ages 4 and 2. She even brought a Michael Myers purse, which we felt was highly inappropriate and frightening for toddlers.<\/p>\n

She seems completely unable to turn the theme \u201coff,\u201d even for major family milestones that focus on young children.<\/p>\n

When our family gently tried to talk to her about this lifestyle, she got incredibly defensive, started crying and said nobody likes who she is or lets her be herself. It breaks my heart to see her hurt, but extended family and outsiders frequently judge her and think she is \u201cweird.\u201d<\/p>\n

I love my sister and don\u2019t want her to feel isolated. Do we just let her be herself and ignore the critics, or is this extreme obsession a sign of a deeper issue we should address? How do I support her without pushing her away?<\/p>\n

\u2013 Pumpkin Spice Sibling<\/em><\/p>\n

Dear Sibling:<\/strong> The Michael Myers purse notwithstanding, your sister\u2019s interest in Halloween doesn\u2019t seem to be hurting anyone. You can just live and let live here.<\/p>\n

She likely knows that others think she\u2019s weird. But by dressing the way she does, she\u2019s showing it\u2019s more important for her to express herself than to give into societal pressure. Other people\u2019s judgments ultimately aren\u2019t worth much. So, if she\u2019s not letting them get to her, it doesn\u2019t make sense for her immediate family to keep bringing them up and making them an issue.<\/p>\n

\n<\/div>\n

If she was obsessed with \u201cLife is Good\u201d apparel or Christmas sweaters or some other kind of attire, her appearance and choices might go over more smoothly with the general public. But there\u2019s no harm in liking what you like. While her choices wouldn\u2019t be yours, try to be grateful that she\u2019s confident enough to be herself in front of you.<\/p>\n

Dear Eric<\/strong>: About two years ago, my husband was \u201cinvited\u201d to resign his managerial position at a local company. This followed two less-than-great performance reviews which he claimed were the result of not getting along with his boss.<\/p>\n

Fortunately, he was able to find another comparable full-time position quickly. He says he likes his job.<\/p>\n

His new position is a hybrid position, and since I work fully remotely, our at-home days overlap. I\u2019ve noticed he probably puts in five hours on those days. I see him running personal errands, taking long lunches, playing video games and doing home chores throughout the workday.<\/p>\n

Read more Miss Manners: They seem to think my home is some immersive Instagram experience<\/a><\/p>\n

\n<\/div>\n

I had previously thought he had a strong work ethic and admired him for that. Now, seeing this behavior, I\u2019ve lost quite a bit of respect for him. I\u2019m not sure how and if I should broach the subject.<\/p>\n

I considered this on par with stealing. I\u2019m not his boss, but I am worried about him losing his job. We\u2019re older, but we have about five years to work before retirement is an option. I\u2019m stressed in addition to being disappointed in his lack of work ethic.<\/p>\n

\u2013 Coworker Spouse<\/em><\/p>\n

Dear Spouse:<\/strong> While he may not be sitting in front of the computer all day long, it certainly seems like your husband is fairly industrious and good about filling his days. So, it\u2019s possible that the job doesn\u2019t take all eight hours of the workday to complete.<\/p>\n

Without being inside his company, it\u2019s hard to tell if this is an issue for his boss. Maybe he\u2019s found a good fit where the culture is centered around getting the job done rather than performing productivity.<\/p>\n

Obviously, this is all conjecture. I can\u2019t say for sure. But there can be something strange that happens when you see a partner in their work environment and it\u2019s not always about the work so much as it is about the jarring difference of context.<\/p>\n

His work ethic notwithstanding, the issue between the two of you is easier to address.<\/p>\n

You\u2019re still stinging from his soft-firing two years ago and you, rightfully, have anxieties about retirement and your financial stability. So, start by talking about those feelings, using your new co-working setup as a jumping off point.<\/p>\n

Tell him that you trust him (if you do) but that it\u2019s been hard seeing him spend time during the workday doing other things. Tell him that it has brought up anxieties about your future. Use \u201cI\u201d statements as much as you can, so this doesn\u2019t sound like a performance review.<\/p>\n

Ask him if he understands where you\u2019re coming from and if there are things that he can do or say to help you feel better about your plan for the next five years and beyond.<\/p>\n

Send questions to R. Eric Thomas at eric@askingeric.com or P.O. Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Follow him on Instagram @oureric and sign up for his weekly newsletter at rericthomas.com.<\/em><\/p>\n

Read more Dear Abby: Should I write an erotic memoir for my children to find when I\u2019m gone?<\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

She even brought a Michael Myers purse to a toddler’s party.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":5293,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5386","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-advice"],"yoast_head":"\nAsking Eric: People think my Halloween-obsessed sister is weird. Should I be worried about her? - Next City Digest<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=5386\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Asking Eric: People think my Halloween-obsessed sister is weird. 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