{"id":5382,"date":"2026-07-25T08:07:21","date_gmt":"2026-07-25T08:07:21","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=5382"},"modified":"2026-07-25T08:07:21","modified_gmt":"2026-07-25T08:07:21","slug":"dear-abby-should-i-write-an-erotic-memoir-for-my-children-to-find-when-im-gone","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=5382","title":{"rendered":"Dear Abby: Should I write an erotic memoir for my children to find when I&#8217;m gone?"},"content":{"rendered":"<div>\n<div>\n<p><strong>DEAR ABBY<\/strong>: I have been lucky. I have done well and lived a good life. I\u2019m married (my third time), and I have adult children and grandkids.<\/p>\n<p>Read more <a href=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=5381\">LeBron James spurns Warriors for 76ers in free agency saga. Here\u2019s what it means.<\/a><\/p>\n<p>For most of my life, I have had an active sex life. Much of it I wouldn\u2019t want my children to know about while I\u2019m alive, but it could make for some erotic reading years after I\u2019m gone.<\/p>\n<p>Should I write my honest accounting covering 50 years and leave it for posterity?<\/p>\n<p><em>\u2014 TALES TO TELL IN FLORIDA<\/em><\/p>\n<p><strong>DEAR TALES:<\/strong> For the sake of your children, their spouses and your grandchildren, please resist the urge to recount in detail your sexual history. When you depart this earthly plane, leave them with at least a few illusions, I\u2019m begging you.<\/p>\n<p><strong>DEAR ABBY<\/strong>: After a four-year battle with cancer, my husband of 27 years passed away. After his death, I was contacted by a guy I had been involved with 40 years before.<\/p>\n<p>He said he wanted me to know that he was there for me if I needed to talk or just needed some company. I told him how much I appreciated it and I would call if I felt he could help.<\/p>\n<p>This man was someone I had loved intensely. We had dated for seven years when he broke my heart. He was seeing other people behind my back, and when I found out, I broke up with him.<\/p>\n<div>\n<\/div>\n<p>We always managed to stay in touch, though. He would call to wish me happy birthday or just say hi. We remained friends. He dated a couple of people I knew, and we would run into each other a couple of times a year.<\/p>\n<p>Well, we are now seeing each other again. He has told me how sorry he is for breaking my heart all those years ago. He says he knows that being a man is not being with every woman you possibly can be with but being willing to commit to the one woman you know you love. He says he knows he made a mistake and he loves me and wants us to spend the rest of our lives together.<\/p>\n<p>Read more <a href=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=5379\">Vehicle fire sparks 10-acre blaze near I-680<\/a><\/p>\n<p>The problem: I can\u2019t stop thinking about all the women he has been with and how I will never be able to measure up to them.<\/p>\n<p>There\u2019s nothing special about me. I\u2019m not beautiful, I don\u2019t have a \u201ckiller body\u201d and I don\u2019t have a lot of money.<\/p>\n<div>\n<\/div>\n<p>I don\u2019t want to ruin what is possibly the best thing that has ever happened to me, but I just can\u2019t seem to move past this. What can I do to move forward from his past?<\/p>\n<p><em>\u2014 BACK WHERE I STARTED IN TENNESSEE<\/em><\/p>\n<p><strong>DEAR BACK:<\/strong> The only thing that could ruin what is possibly the best thing that has ever happened to you is your low level of self-esteem.<\/p>\n<p>This man appears to have matured in the years since you broke up with him. He isn\u2019t after a sugar mama, a raving beauty or a woman built like a racing sloop. He is interested in the person you are.<\/p>\n<p>Please ask your doctor for a referral to a licensed mental health professional who can help you make a serious attitude adjustment before your insecurity ruins what could potentially be a happy future.<\/p>\n<p><em>Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Read more <a href=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=5377\">Bay FC\u2019s franchise-tying unbeaten streak snapped by deflection in stoppage time<\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Plus: I can&#8217;t stop thinking about my boyfriend&#8217;s past women.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":5287,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5382","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-advice"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.6 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Dear Abby: Should I write an erotic memoir for my children to find when I&#8217;m gone? - Next City Digest<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=5382\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Dear Abby: Should I write an erotic memoir for my children to find when I&#8217;m gone? 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