{"id":495,"date":"2026-05-26T08:07:20","date_gmt":"2026-05-26T08:07:20","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=495"},"modified":"2026-05-26T08:07:20","modified_gmt":"2026-05-26T08:07:20","slug":"dear-abby-he-claims-his-job-is-more-demanding-than-mine-it-is-not","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=495","title":{"rendered":"Dear Abby: He claims his job is more demanding than mine. It is not."},"content":{"rendered":"<div>\n<div>\n<p><strong>DEAR ABBY<\/strong>: My partner, \u201cGreg,\u201d and I have been together a year. I\u2019m getting the impression my success at work is making him insecure.<\/p>\n<p>Read more <a href=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=494\">President Trump predicts Colbert finale is \u2018beginning of the end\u2019 of late night<\/a><\/p>\n<p>I pursued a stable and high-paying career. I enjoy knowing I can support my future children\u2019s needs financially. My success has now resulted in several big promotions, which means more demanding schedules and draining technical tasks at times.<\/p>\n<p>During my stressful times at work, I\u2019ve noticed Greg suddenly withdraws and begins boasting about his income and work demands. He comes by less often, and when he is around, he acts uninterested in my activities and refuses to help with household chores, claiming his work is so demanding and he\u2019s so important that he\u2019s too tired.<\/p>\n<p>Abby, Greg\u2019s job is much less demanding than mine, and I feel he\u2019s overinflating it to pump up his ego.<\/p>\n<p>I have tried to encourage his confidence, but that only seems to make him less focused on helping me. I don\u2019t think it\u2019s a coincidence that every time my workload is more stressful and I need his help, he disappears.<\/p>\n<p>Greg has also promised for months that he\u2019s moving in with me, but it has been five months now and still nothing.<\/p>\n<p>I\u2019ve raised these issues and told him I feel lonely and unsupported. His response is that I \u201chave the wrong idea\u201d and he is \u201cnot a sexist,\u201d but I can\u2019t help but see a pattern.<\/p>\n<p>I want a family, and I\u2019m looking to settle down. I need someone I can rely on when times are tough. Should I keep trying to work things out with Greg, or will his ego be a forever issue? Should I cut my losses?<\/p>\n<div>\n<\/div>\n<p><em>\u2014 CAREER-CONFLICTED IN COLORADO<\/em><\/p>\n<p><strong>DEAR CAREER-CONFLICTED<\/strong>: Face it \u2014 what you\u2019ve got with Greg is what you will get if the relationship goes further.<\/p>\n<p>Read more <a href=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=492\">Chef Jos\u00e9 Andr\u00e9s shares Spanish recipes and lore in \u2018Spain My Way\u2019<\/a><\/p>\n<p>He may be a nice, if insecure, man, but you have more than one issue going on with him. You are successful; he is less so.<\/p>\n<p>If you (and he) are willing to go for couples counseling, it may be possible to forge the closer relationship you are looking for. However, if that\u2019s not possible, then you should part as friends.<\/p>\n<div>\n<\/div>\n<p><strong>DEAR ABBY<\/strong>: We have some dear friends with whom we socialize a lot. However, it seems that every time we invite them to do something, they invite others (whom we know) to join in.<\/p>\n<p>Our latest invitation is to visit us at our lake house for several days. They would like to bring their adult son and his girlfriend. While we like their son a lot, we do not know the girlfriend.<\/p>\n<p>We don\u2019t want to hurt their feelings or our friendship, but we are getting tired of our invitations being extended to others. How do we respond to them to stop this?<\/p>\n<p><em>\u2014 GRACIOUS SOUTHERNERS<\/em><\/p>\n<p><strong>DEAR GRACIOUS<\/strong>: What this couple is doing is rude. Respond by telling them that while you love them and their son, you do not know the girlfriend and are not comfortable hosting a stranger for an entire weekend.<\/p>\n<p>Give them time to absorb your message. Then, the next time they attempt to include more guests in your invitation, explain that it is for them only.<\/p>\n<p><em>Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Read more <a href=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=475\">Memorial Day check-in: SF Giants hope miserable start offers valuable lessons<\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Dear Abby: I&#8217;ve built a high-paying career, and I need to know I can count on him to help me.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":88,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-495","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-advice"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.6 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Dear Abby: He claims his job is more demanding than mine. 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