{"id":4730,"date":"2026-07-17T08:35:56","date_gmt":"2026-07-17T08:35:56","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=4730"},"modified":"2026-07-17T08:35:56","modified_gmt":"2026-07-17T08:35:56","slug":"miss-manners-am-i-wrong-to-expect-pedestrians-to-wave-back-at-me-when-im-driving","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=4730","title":{"rendered":"Miss Manners: Am I wrong to expect pedestrians to wave back at me when I’m driving?"},"content":{"rendered":"
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DEAR MISS MANNERS<\/strong>: I notice more and more that in rural\/suburban areas, pedestrians, bicycle riders and other people on the road are outright ignoring cars as they pass.<\/p>\n

Read more Dear Abby: I don\u2019t want to give my infuriating in-laws a grandchild<\/a><\/p>\n

That isn\u2019t to say they\u2019re wandering willy-nilly everywhere, just that they\u2019re not acknowledging a wave from the driver in the vehicle.<\/p>\n

I was raised to wave at folks on the side of the road, including road workers, bikers and anyone else using the shared space. I am in a device that is larger, faster and could potentially hurt them. By providing wide berth and a friendly wave, I\u2019m acknowledging their existence, their right to use the space and respect for their peace.<\/p>\n

To at least let me know they\u2019re aware, can\u2019t a wave be returned?<\/p>\n

It\u2019s a silly thing, perhaps, but it makes me wonder if people know about this tradition on the road.<\/p>\n

GENTLE READER:<\/strong> Yes, but maybe we allow the bicyclists a reprieve. So that they can keep both hands on the handlebars.<\/p>\n

DEAR MISS MANNERS<\/strong>: My husband and I had a beautiful in-ground pool installed on our property this year. We live in a very rural area with a lot of land between us and the neighbors.<\/p>\n

We have some close friends in the neighborhood and have invited them to swim. Although they have visited and enjoyed sitting by the pool, none have taken the plunge.<\/p>\n

\n<\/div>\n

A new couple moved into the neighborhood and invited us to dinner, along with a couple of other neighbors. Upon leaving, I said we would have them over in return sometime.<\/p>\n

The husband responded with \u201cCan we swim in your pool?\u201d in a somewhat joking manner. Since I felt that these very respectable people would not take advantage, I said \u201cSure, anytime.\u201d<\/p>\n

Read more JD Vance demanded military helicopter transport for son\u2019s golf lesson: report<\/a><\/p>\n

Our summer has been busy, so we have not had a chance to invite them back. Do we need to hurry before the cooler temperatures set in, so that the invitation can include the swim that he mentioned? Or are we only obligated to honor the promise we made to have them over for dinner?<\/p>\n

GENTLE READER<\/strong>: You will be relieved to hear that \u201cSure, anytime\u201d is not binding. Frankly, Miss Manners is relieved that this question was not about the neighbors taking your words literally and using the pool without your consent.<\/p>\n

\n<\/div>\n

You indeed are obligated only to invite the neighbors back over eventually. But if it is not before the weather cools, it would be gracious to add your apologies for not doing so during pool season. Then try harder next year.<\/p>\n

DEAR MISS MANNERS:<\/strong> As we are in an election year, help me figure out what to say when a friend asks for your political endorsement, but you think she would be terrible in that elected position.<\/p>\n

I love this friend dearly, but she absolutely does not have the temperament for the job.<\/p>\n

GENTLE READER<\/strong>: Maybe, for the sake of the friendship, do not tell her that.<\/p>\n

Miss Manners suggests instead something noncommittal such as, \u201cI am so proud of you. What a worthy endeavor!\u201d And when she inevitably presses for your support, \u201cI\u2019m not sure what I\u2019m doing yet, but I think it\u2019s so great that you are trying to make the world better.\u201d<\/p>\n

If she does win, perhaps she will surprise you. Fortunately for the friendship, voting is still private.<\/p>\n

Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, gentlereader@missmanners.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.<\/em><\/p>\n

Read more Letters: Forest Service changes threaten dog-friendly wilderness<\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Plus: The new neighbors want to use our pool. Can I wait until it’s cold to invite them?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":90,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4730","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-advice"],"yoast_head":"\nMiss Manners: Am I wrong to expect pedestrians to wave back at me when I’m driving? - Next City Digest<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=4730\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Miss Manners: Am I wrong to expect pedestrians to wave back at me when I’m driving? - Next City Digest\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Plus: The new neighbors want to use our pool. 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