{"id":4095,"date":"2026-07-09T08:08:05","date_gmt":"2026-07-09T08:08:05","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=4095"},"modified":"2026-07-09T08:08:05","modified_gmt":"2026-07-09T08:08:05","slug":"dear-abby-what-if-my-dad-leaves-on-this-foolish-road-trip-without-telling-anyone","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=4095","title":{"rendered":"Dear Abby: What if my dad leaves on this foolish road trip without telling anyone?"},"content":{"rendered":"<div>\n<div>\n<p><strong>DEAR ABBY<\/strong>: At 82, my father continues to live alone and unassisted. He\u2019s generally in good health but is starting to recognize that he won\u2019t be forever.<\/p>\n<p>Read more <a href=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=4094\">Driver charged in Oakland freeway crash where passenger died<\/a><\/p>\n<p>One thing he really wants to do while he still can (or thinks he can) is take a road trip \u2014 by himself \u2014 to visit his sister on the other side of the country.<\/p>\n<p>He regularly does shorter drives (two to three hours) and figures if he takes his time, he can make the 2,000-mile journey by doing many short stretches over a few days. I think it is a colossally bad idea.<\/p>\n<p>He is underestimating the fatigue he\u2019s going to experience after a long day of driving and is forgetting how much extra energy it takes to navigate in an unfamiliar place. I\u2019m worried he\u2019s going to get in an accident or get lost.<\/p>\n<p>After telling him all that, and that he\u2019s got better options, I offered to pay for a plane ticket. But he doesn\u2019t like the idea of trying to navigate an airport (which makes no sense to me compared to driving), or trying to drive an unfamiliar rental car when he arrives. I\u2019ve suggested going with him, but he wants to stay for a long visit, and there isn\u2019t room for me at my aunt\u2019s.<\/p>\n<p>Dad has got his mind set on this trip, and I\u2019m worried he\u2019s going to leave without telling anyone he\u2019s going.<\/p>\n<p>If I can\u2019t reason with him, what can I do? We don\u2019t live close to each other, and I don\u2019t have any right to take his keys, but this is nuts, right?<\/p>\n<p><em>\u2014 SEES A DISASTER IN OHIO<\/em><\/p>\n<div>\n<\/div>\n<p><strong>DEAR SEES:<\/strong> Whether you or I think your father\u2019s plan is nuts is beside the point. He is going to make the trip. However, this does not mean you cannot have some input and assurances.<\/p>\n<p>Help your father plan and map out his trip. Note what hotels or motels there are along the way and help him make reservations. Then get his promise to call you every evening when he checks in so you can know he is all right.<\/p>\n<p>It may take some work on your part, but the reassurance of being able to track his progress would be priceless.<\/p>\n<p>Read more <a href=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=4093\">Kurtenbach: SF Giants\u2019 ineptitude has a surprising limit<\/a><\/p>\n<p><strong>DEAR ABBY<\/strong>: My youngest child (early teens) has a hard time making and keeping friends, but he made a new friend three weeks ago.<\/p>\n<div>\n<\/div>\n<p>I have met the mom once, briefly, and mostly texted to discuss timing for plans with my kid and hers.<\/p>\n<p>The mom keeps asking me for money. Our stories are similar, and I\u2019ve filled her in \u2014 divorced, single mom, no contact with ex, no support.<\/p>\n<p>Most recently, she texted me asking for gas money and additional money to help fund a trip out of state for a funeral.<\/p>\n<p>I may live in a nice house, but I have no help in paying for it plus all the other life expenses. I\u2019ve told her as much, but I still get these requests.<\/p>\n<p>I don\u2019t want to be rude to her, but I feel like my next step is to be blunt. However, I don\u2019t want to risk hurting the friendship between the kids. How do I make it clear without doing damage?<\/p>\n<p><em>\u2014 DOLLARS AND SENSE<\/em><\/p>\n<p><strong>DEAR D &amp; S:<\/strong> Resist the urge to be blunt. Simply tell the woman nicely that you don\u2019t have funds to give her at this time. When she asks again, repeat as necessary.<\/p>\n<p><em>Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Read more <a href=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=4091\">Jaxon Juarez\u2019s family files legal claim against Santa Clara County, state over toddler\u2019s foster care death<\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Plus: A woman I barely know is trying to hit me up for money.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":88,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4095","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-advice"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.6 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Dear Abby: What if my dad leaves on this foolish road trip without telling anyone? - Next City Digest<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=4095\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Dear Abby: What if my dad leaves on this foolish road trip without telling anyone? 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