{"id":3365,"date":"2026-06-30T08:37:29","date_gmt":"2026-06-30T08:37:29","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=3365"},"modified":"2026-06-30T08:37:29","modified_gmt":"2026-06-30T08:37:29","slug":"miss-manners-i-ruined-a-grumpy-shoppers-day-with-my-checkout-line-tactic","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=3365","title":{"rendered":"Miss Manners: I ruined a grumpy shopper’s day with my checkout line tactic"},"content":{"rendered":"
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DEAR MISS MANNERS:<\/strong> I got in line at the grocery store checkout, quickly followed by another woman behind me.<\/p>\n

Read more Dear Abby: I can\u2019t tell my best friend I\u2019m in love with him<\/a><\/p>\n

Apparently, she thought she should have gotten my place in line, as she began loudly grumbling about the rudeness of people!<\/p>\n

When we approached the checkout counter, she still grumbled. So I asked her to go ahead of me. She looked startled and shook her head dismissively. I insisted, saying she had only one item, whereas I had several.<\/p>\n

She darted ahead without a word as though I\u2019d insulted her. My common courtesy ruined her day.<\/p>\n

GENTLE READER:<\/strong> Unkind people would condemn this as passive-aggressive behavior. Miss Manners commends it as better than the usual aggressive-aggressive behavior \u2014 and more effective.<\/p>\n

DEAR MISS MANNERS<\/strong>: My husband and I were on the coast and stopped at a quaint place for lunch. I ordered a lobster tail, which came with the shell on. When I started to open it, it suddenly flew off my plate and out into the dining room somewhere.<\/p>\n

Being an independent and adventurous woman, I decided to go track it down and found myself wandering around the venue, peering sidewise under tables until I finally located the orange shell. I picked it up and went back to my table where my husband was in convulsions.<\/p>\n

I tried to calm him, acknowledging that it was indeed quite not normal for people\u2019s lunch to fly into the center of a dining room. But he said it was not so much that I went looking for my lunch, but the gooey brown stain I had all over my backside that had been on display throughout my search.<\/p>\n

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Now mind you, it was summer, so of course I was wearing white pants.<\/p>\n

Horrified, I peered around to check, and indeed, there was a thick gooey dark substance smeared all over the seat of my pants. I then discovered additional evidence of there having been brown droppings on the chair where I had been seated.<\/p>\n

Read more Antioch to decide on Homekey grant in July in effort to help city\u2019s homeless<\/a><\/p>\n

The question I am left with is: What kind of a tip should one be expected to leave in such a situation?<\/p>\n

GENTLE READER:<\/strong> Aren\u2019t you going to charge entertainment tax? And perhaps request alimony?<\/p>\n

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Leaving aside the marital failing for the moment, Miss Manners can assure you that you needn\u2019t indulge in retrospective embarrassment. Small accidents, although no fault of your own, may cause this. Had you merely walked around peering under people\u2019s tables, unkind people may have snickered \u2014 and resolved not to order the lobster.<\/p>\n

But adding the pants display made it so awful that no one would have had the emotional freedom to make fun of you. They were all too busy being grateful that it had not happened to themselves.<\/p>\n

To answer your question: One should always tip extra when causing extra work. Presumably the staff will have to clean up that chair \u2014 although, how did the mess get there?<\/p>\n

But there is another question you should be asking. It is a sacred marital duty to rescue one\u2019s spouse from a difficult, not to say ludicrous, situation. What was yours doing while you went lobster hunting? Laughing? Eating his own lobster? Pretending he was not with you?<\/p>\n

Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, gentlereader@missmanners.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.<\/em><\/p>\n

Read more Berkeley ex-school teacher who claimed to be in love with student sentenced to prison<\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Plus: After such humiliation, what sort of tip should I have left?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":90,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3365","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-advice"],"yoast_head":"\nMiss Manners: I ruined a grumpy shopper’s day with my checkout line tactic - Next City Digest<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=3365\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Miss Manners: I ruined a grumpy shopper’s day with my checkout line tactic - Next City Digest\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Plus: After such humiliation, what sort of tip should I have left?\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=3365\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Next City Digest\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2026-06-30T08:37:29+00:00\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"admin\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"admin\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"3 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=3365#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=3365\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"admin\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/13065d40d633843429ac57d4e5c06f9b\"},\"headline\":\"Miss Manners: I ruined a grumpy shopper’s day with my checkout line tactic\",\"datePublished\":\"2026-06-30T08:37:29+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=3365\"},\"wordCount\":635,\"commentCount\":0,\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=3365#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2026\\\/05\\\/d6e357d2c0c1e09171c3fd5fa0d95fef.webp\",\"articleSection\":[\"Advice\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=3365#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=3365\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=3365\",\"name\":\"Miss Manners: I ruined a grumpy shopper’s day with my checkout line tactic - 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