{"id":3364,"date":"2026-06-30T08:07:06","date_gmt":"2026-06-30T08:07:06","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=3364"},"modified":"2026-06-30T08:07:06","modified_gmt":"2026-06-30T08:07:06","slug":"dear-abby-i-cant-tell-my-best-friend-im-in-love-with-him","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=3364","title":{"rendered":"Dear Abby: I can’t tell my best friend I’m in love with him"},"content":{"rendered":"
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DEAR ABBY<\/strong>: A year and a half ago, I met someone online who I\u2019ll call \u201cDrew.\u201d We immediately hit it off and have talked every day since then, often multiple times a day, with near-constant texting, etc.<\/p>\n

Read more Antioch to decide on Homekey grant in July in effort to help city\u2019s homeless<\/a><\/p>\n

Drew quickly became my best friend. After a while, I realized that I don\u2019t just love him, I am in love<\/em> with him. Deeply.<\/p>\n

We\u2019ve met in person a few times, and that has only served to confirm my feelings. I feel safe, happy and cared for in his company, and there is nothing in the world I wouldn\u2019t do for him if he asked. Yet he asks nothing of me.<\/p>\n

Drew has a partner, and I assume the feelings I have for him are not mutual, although I know he considers me a very good friend.<\/p>\n

I wish I knew how to proceed. Telling him how I feel is not an option, nor is ending the friendship I rely on.<\/p>\n

Is it possible to continue as we are? How am I supposed to deal with these feelings?<\/p>\n

\u2014 HIS NON-BOYFRIEND IN CANADA<\/em><\/p>\n

DEAR NON-BOYFRIEND:<\/strong> Here\u2019s how: Recognize that you and Drew are overdue for an honest conversation about what has been going on.<\/p>\n

\n<\/div>\n

Ask if his partner knows about you. When someone spends as much time as you two have on the phone and texting, there is usually more going on than just friendship. If there isn\u2019t on Drew\u2019s part, you need to know that. However, if your feelings are mutual, then you and Drew have some serious thinking and planning to do.<\/p>\n

DEAR ABBY<\/strong>: I don\u2019t care for my son\u2019s girlfriend, \u201cTrish,\u201d and he knows it.<\/p>\n

He seems to date needy women. It may boost his ego, but it doesn\u2019t reflect well on the young lady.<\/p>\n

Read more Berkeley ex-school teacher who claimed to be in love with student sentenced to prison<\/a><\/p>\n

Our initial encounter with Trish wasn\u2019t a good one. We found her to be rude and disrespectful. He claims she was \u201cnervous.\u201d It\u2019s common courtesy to acknowledge those in a room when you enter if they\u2019re the only ones in the room.<\/p>\n

\n<\/div>\n

I don\u2019t know if my son plans to marry Trish, but this isn\u2019t the relationship I assumed I\u2019d have with my son\u2019s wife. I don\u2019t want to just tolerate my daughter-in-law; I want to love her.<\/p>\n

Trish has made no effort to know my son\u2019s family, not even his brother. She doesn\u2019t view us as factors in his life at all.<\/p>\n

How do I get him to launch his net into the deep end and find a good wife?<\/p>\n

\u2014 ANXIOUS MOM IN VIRGINIA<\/em><\/p>\n

DEAR MOM<\/strong>: I don\u2019t know whether your son intends to marry this young woman either, and you could be worried for no reason. But one thing I do know is how important it is for you to extend yourself and try to make a friend out of Trish rather than an enemy.<\/p>\n

Without being nosy, get to know her background. Does she have a healthy relationship with her own mother? Does she know any of the rules of etiquette? (She may never have been taught.)<\/p>\n

If you reach out and make the attempt, you may wind up having a daughter-in-law you can love rather than one you have to tolerate. I wish you luck.<\/p>\n

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.<\/em><\/p>\n

Read more Sharks\u2019 Kesselring says he learned a \u2018tough lesson\u2019 with Buffalo Sabres<\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

We text nearly constantly, but he has a partner.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":88,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3364","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-advice"],"yoast_head":"\nDear Abby: I can’t tell my best friend I’m in love with him - Next City Digest<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=3364\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Dear Abby: I can’t tell my best friend I’m in love with him - Next City Digest\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"We text nearly constantly, but he has a partner.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=3364\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Next City Digest\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2026-06-30T08:07:06+00:00\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"admin\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"admin\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"3 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=3364#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=3364\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"admin\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/13065d40d633843429ac57d4e5c06f9b\"},\"headline\":\"Dear Abby: I can’t tell my best friend I’m in love with him\",\"datePublished\":\"2026-06-30T08:07:06+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=3364\"},\"wordCount\":650,\"commentCount\":0,\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=3364#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2026\\\/05\\\/da2b25e1d5f51854817d4fde3f343c6c.webp\",\"articleSection\":[\"Advice\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=3364#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=3364\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=3364\",\"name\":\"Dear Abby: I can’t tell my best friend I’m in love with him - 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