{"id":2233,"date":"2026-06-16T08:06:48","date_gmt":"2026-06-16T08:06:48","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=2233"},"modified":"2026-06-16T08:06:48","modified_gmt":"2026-06-16T08:06:48","slug":"dear-abby-my-friend-wont-speak-to-me-because-of-this-birthday-dinner-dispute","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=2233","title":{"rendered":"Dear Abby: My friend won’t speak to me because of this birthday dinner dispute"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n
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DEAR ABBY:<\/strong> I invited a friend, \u201cSybil,\u201d to dinner at a fine dining, special occasion restaurant to celebrate her birthday.<\/p>\n

Read more Polish or potential: Warriors work out centers on opposite ends of NBA draft spectrum<\/a><\/p>\n

About a month before the date, I called to say I had also asked someone else to join us, as it was also her birthday. I thought the three of us would have fun, as we rarely go to fine dining establishments. I was the host, so I said that I would pay for all of us.<\/p>\n

Sybil said she wouldn\u2019t go unless I \u201cuninvited\u201d the third person! A week after I refused to do that, I received an email saying \u201cleave me alone\u201d after I\u2019d unsuccessfully tried to phone and set up an alternative date to celebrate, but at a less expensive restaurant. I could not afford to host two fine-dining nights out.<\/p>\n

That was five months ago. Now what? I won\u2019t apologize for including another person at a dinner party I was hosting, but I am willing to move on.<\/p>\n

It took a mutual friend to explain to me why I got the \u201cleave me alone\u201d email. It never occurred to me that I could be wrong. I don\u2019t think I was. Do you?<\/p>\n

\u2014 GOOD INTENTIONS IN CALIFORNIA<\/em><\/p>\n

DEAR GOOD INTENTIONS<\/strong>: It might have been better form to have asked Sybil if she would mind your including another birthday girl at the dinner before you did it, but not having done that was insufficient reason to excommunicate you.<\/p>\n

I do not think you owe her an apology. On the contrary, she owes you one for overreacting the way she did.<\/p>\n

\n<\/div>\n

DEAR ABBY<\/strong>: Three years ago, I found out that the man who raised me wasn\u2019t my biological father.<\/p>\n

Read more 16-year-old California boy fatally shot by police after allegedly stabbing mother\u2019s boyfriend<\/a><\/p>\n

I suspected it for many years and asked my mother about it twice. She angrily denied it both times.<\/p>\n

The man who raised me was definitely my dad. He passed away in 1989. I recently found out that he knew of my parentage all my life.<\/p>\n

Through a cousin, I found my DNA profile. I reached out to my biological father. We met twice and have a cordial relationship. I sent him and his wife a Christmas card, which he acknowledged with a phone call. He says that he\u2019s so glad I reached out to him. I also call him around his birthday but do not send a card.<\/p>\n

\n<\/div>\n

Would it be weird for me to acknowledge Father\u2019s Day with him? I have just been letting it pass by. He wasn\u2019t a dad to me, but we all know he\u2019s my father (as does his one other daughter).<\/p>\n

For whatever reason, I want to send him a card. Or should I call? Maybe this is a \u201cme\u201d thing. I\u2019d like your advice.<\/p>\n

\u2014 WONDERING IN WISCONSIN<\/em><\/p>\n

DEAR WONDERING<\/strong>: I can understand why, having lost the man you always regarded as your father, you feel a desire to have a father figure in your life. Why not ask your biological father how he feels about a card and a call and what he would prefer?<\/p>\n

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.<\/em><\/p>\n

Read more SF Giants who wrote Bible verses on Pride hats get MLB warning: report<\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It never occurred to me that I was in the wrong. Was I?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":88,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2233","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-advice"],"yoast_head":"\nDear Abby: My friend won’t speak to me because of this birthday dinner dispute - Next City Digest<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=2233\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Dear Abby: My friend won’t speak to me because of this birthday dinner dispute - Next City Digest\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"It never occurred to me that I was in the wrong. 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