{"id":1749,"date":"2026-06-10T09:07:49","date_gmt":"2026-06-10T09:07:49","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=1749"},"modified":"2026-06-10T09:07:49","modified_gmt":"2026-06-10T09:07:49","slug":"harriette-cole-there-are-days-when-my-anxiety-is-out-of-control","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=1749","title":{"rendered":"Harriette Cole: There are days when my anxiety is out of control"},"content":{"rendered":"
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DEAR HARRIETTE:<\/strong> The past year has been challenging mentally. I experienced lows that felt lower than ever, but I am proud of myself for pushing through it.<\/p>\n

Read more Today in History: June 10, Benito Mussolini enters Italy into World War II<\/a><\/p>\n

I have struggled with anxiety in the past; it has definitely gotten worse recently and has started to feel debilitating. I started therapy, which has helped, but I am still having panic attacks, and there are days that I feel out of control.<\/p>\n

I have tried additional support, like aromatherapy and walking. Although they have helped, I do not think there is a single fix. I am always looking to add tools to my toolbox. I\u2019ve been looking into somatic therapy, but I haven\u2019t been able to find a somatic therapist in my network.<\/p>\n

What recommendations would you make for dealing with anxiety?<\/p>\n

\u2014 Anxious<\/em><\/p>\n

DEAR ANXIOUS<\/strong>: You may want to see a psychiatrist. I know many people who have had success taking medicine to help balance their systems. That combined with somatic therapy could be a winning combination.<\/p>\n

Some have also had success with consistent physical exercise and creative expression. Join a gym, a yoga class or Pilates. Take regular walks. Consider taking an art, music or dance class. Keep your mind active.<\/p>\n

Surrounding yourself with good company is also very important. Look at the people in your life. Notice how many naysayers there are. Do your best to weed out the people who stir the pot. Replace them with problem solvers and people who know how to love you without judgment.<\/p>\n

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Do your best not to isolate. Find your people and spend time with them. Stop yourself when you start complaining in your head and to others. Practice active positivity.<\/p>\n

Read more Dear Abby: I notice women cruising my wife wherever we go<\/a><\/p>\n

DEAR HARRIETTE<\/strong>: I have not been on the dating scene for years, but I recently put myself out there. I am a young 70-year-old, and I met a man who is in his late 50s. We hit it off and like each other a lot.<\/p>\n

We do have a problem, though. We attempted to get intimate, and it was uncomfortable and painful. It was awkward, but we still had a nice time.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m not sure what to do. I don\u2019t want this to be a deal-breaker. I\u2019ve heard that the body changes down there, but I didn\u2019t know it changed that much.<\/p>\n

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What can I do, and what should I say to him? I don\u2019t want to avoid intimacy.<\/p>\n

\u2014 Uncomfortable<\/em><\/p>\n

DEAR UNCOMFORTABLE<\/strong>: Schedule a visit with your gynecologist. You may have vaginal atrophy, which is a condition triggered by menopause, caused by diminished estrogen production that leads to dryness, irritation and sometimes painful sex. There are treatments that you can use to help make it more comfortable or even possible to have a sex life. Get medical help.<\/p>\n

What you can tell him is that you are tending to it. Meanwhile, you can also try lubrication. Depending upon the state of your body, that may make it possible for you to have intercourse. Or take your time enjoying each other without full penetration.<\/p>\n

Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c\/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.<\/em><\/p>\n

Read more Former Stanford standout Nadia Fingall gives Valkyries depth, defense in frontcourt<\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Harriette Cole: I’ve tried various things, but I don’t think there’s a single fix.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":92,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1749","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-advice"],"yoast_head":"\nHarriette Cole: There are days when my anxiety is out of control - Next City Digest<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=1749\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Harriette Cole: There are days when my anxiety is out of control - Next City Digest\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Harriette Cole: I've tried various things, but I don't think there's a single fix.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=1749\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Next City Digest\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2026-06-10T09:07:49+00:00\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"admin\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"admin\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"3 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=1749#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=1749\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"admin\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/13065d40d633843429ac57d4e5c06f9b\"},\"headline\":\"Harriette Cole: There are days when my anxiety is out of control\",\"datePublished\":\"2026-06-10T09:07:49+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=1749\"},\"wordCount\":598,\"commentCount\":0,\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=1749#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2026\\\/05\\\/0139233f8c854ca253912d1b9432926f.webp\",\"articleSection\":[\"Advice\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=1749#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=1749\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=1749\",\"name\":\"Harriette Cole: There are days when my anxiety is out of control - 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