{"id":1003,"date":"2026-06-02T08:09:13","date_gmt":"2026-06-02T08:09:13","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=1003"},"modified":"2026-06-02T08:09:13","modified_gmt":"2026-06-02T08:09:13","slug":"dear-abby-my-wife-cried-over-this-man-but-she-wont-admit-an-affair","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=1003","title":{"rendered":"Dear Abby: My wife cried over this man but she won’t admit an affair"},"content":{"rendered":"
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DEAR ABBY<\/strong>: I suspect my wife had an affair some years ago. She was spending time with this man in a bar on weekends for quite a while.<\/p>\n

Read more Review: New \u2018Phantom\u2019 swoops in to restore musical\u2019s reputation<\/a><\/p>\n

I recently confronted her with the rumors going around, and she says she did nothing wrong. When she began talking about him with me one day in her bedroom, she became very emotional and cried, telling me about how kind, gentle, etc., he was. Yet she insists he was barely an acquaintance.<\/p>\n

Forgiveness is forthcoming if I can get to the truth. The man is now deceased. Any advice would be appreciated.<\/p>\n

\u2014 TO BELIEVE OR NOT TO BELIEVE<\/em><\/p>\n

DEAR BELIEVE:<\/strong> The drinking buddy (now deceased) who was \u201ckind, gentle, etc.\u201d and probably an empathetic listener, who is still missed by your wife, is not a threat to your marriage.<\/p>\n

My advice to you is to quit rooting around in the past looking for a grievance and to concentrate on the present, because nothing good will come of what you are doing.<\/p>\n

DEAR ABBY:<\/strong> I have been with my boyfriend for 10 years. In that time, he has never once shown outward affection toward me.<\/p>\n

If I get hurt he says, \u201cWell, why did you do that?\u201d He says he loves me. I just don\u2019t feel loved at all. It has now been six months with no sex.<\/p>\n

\n<\/div>\n

I recently met someone who asks me how my day was, did I eat, how I\u2019m feeling and so on. It feels good to hear these things.<\/p>\n

My question is, if I\u2019m being open and honest with this person, am I emotionally cheating?<\/p>\n

Read more One injured in East Bay shooting; suspect arrested<\/a><\/p>\n

\u2014 MISSING SOMETHING IN MICHIGAN<\/em><\/p>\n

DEAR MISSING<\/strong>: A man who shows no outward signs of affection for a decade, who shows no concern or sympathy if you are hurt and who has no physical relationship with you for half a year not only does not \u201clove\u201d you, but whether he even likes you is debatable.<\/p>\n

\n<\/div>\n

It is not cheating to respond to someone who gives you the things you are starved for. If this relationship goes farther than friendship, then it\u2019s time to break up with your boyfriend.<\/p>\n

DEAR ABBY<\/strong>: My wife died after a yearlong illness. We had been married 51 years and six months to the day.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m going through all of the emotions associated with losing a spouse. I know it will get easier in the coming months, so I\u2019m not looking for advice.<\/p>\n

My wife was the photographer in our family, and we have hundreds of photos \u2014 but very few of her, especially in the last few years. This message is for the kids, grandkids and great-grands: Take pictures of your parents, aunts, uncles, grandparents \u2014 everybody in the family.<\/p>\n

Don\u2019t fall into the \u201cI\u2019ll do it next time\u201d trap. Tomorrow might be too late.<\/p>\n

\u2014 GET THE PICTURE<\/em><\/p>\n

DEAR GET THE PICTURE:<\/strong> I\u2019m sorry for your loss, and for all the memories you wish had been preserved in photos. In the modern age, when most adults have smartphones with cameras, we need to remember to use them. Don\u2019t let one family member bear this responsibility alone. You\u2019ll want to cherish pictures of that person someday as well.<\/p>\n

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.<\/em><\/p>\n

Read more Kurtenbach: Baseball\u2019s bargain bin franchises are exposing the SF Giants\u2019 grift<\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

He’s dead now, and I’m willing to forgive if she tells the truth<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":88,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1003","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-advice"],"yoast_head":"\nDear Abby: My wife cried over this man but she won’t admit an affair - Next City Digest<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=1003\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Dear Abby: My wife cried over this man but she won’t admit an affair - Next City Digest\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"He's dead now, and I'm willing to forgive if she tells the truth\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/nextcitydigest.com\/?p=1003\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Next City Digest\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2026-06-02T08:09:13+00:00\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"admin\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"admin\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"3 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=1003#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=1003\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"admin\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/13065d40d633843429ac57d4e5c06f9b\"},\"headline\":\"Dear Abby: My wife cried over this man but she won’t admit an affair\",\"datePublished\":\"2026-06-02T08:09:13+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=1003\"},\"wordCount\":622,\"commentCount\":0,\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=1003#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2026\\\/05\\\/da2b25e1d5f51854817d4fde3f343c6c.webp\",\"articleSection\":[\"Advice\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=1003#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=1003\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/nextcitydigest.com\\\/?p=1003\",\"name\":\"Dear Abby: My wife cried over this man but she won’t admit an affair - 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